You know what I love? Puppies. And Pr0n, but not together.


I'm sitting around on Monday night after working out, which beat the shit out of me I might add, when everything starts going off at once. My BlackBerry is buzzing away, I got messenger dinging away patiently like some polite little alarm clock, my phone is ringing, and all I wanted to do is sit down, chill and play video games this Monday. Since I'm back in frugal mode, video games seem to lend themselves to something to do to kill time and not cost me a mucho dinero, but I'm leading the cart before the horse. As some of you may have noticed, I'm kind of prone to jumping around a bit. Enough. Back on track.

So all my electronic goodies are going off around me when an epiphany strikes me. Ok, not so much an epiphany as a realization, as I'm sure I'm not the first person to realize this. Through progress, technology, and all that happy horseshit, we decided to create devices so it is more convenient for us as a society. We have computers to do all our math for us, cell phones and pagers so we can communicate with our friends and learn what they are having for dinner tonight, because that is so important that we have to know, and a host of other stuff including a synthetic love doll that is anatomically correct and will only cost you $13000 dollars. Maybe the doll doesn't quite fall into the category, but anyways, we must have thought, this will be cool. I can get a hold of my buddies even if they are out hooking up, or whatever. I just find it insanely amusing that we created all this stuff for convenience, and now they have all become shackles. Quick raise of hands, out of everyone out there, how many of you carry a cell, pager, or BlackBerry? Now, how many of you carry it for work purposes? I'm guessing lots of you. Isn't it amusing that what we made to give us more time is actually sucking it away? Maybe it's just me, but I don't think so. When is it exactly when we reach critical mass and we realize it's time to unplug? There was a scare a few months back where a bunch of the core routers of the internet were vulnerable to a hack that could potentially cripple the internet and take it down, and as much as I love techy stuff and the internet, I was actually looking forward to it. I am also painfully aware of the oxymoronic statement of me writing this on a computer for publishing on the internet thanks.


It may have sounded like Bitterman took over there for a while, but wasn't the case. I wanted to make a point with all that rambling that was inspired by Sarah Silverman's Dvd (pick it up by the way. Very funny shit. Go here). There was a line she said about pessimistic people that really caught my attention. To paraphrase, it went something like this. "It [what I said] goes through this Rube Goldberg crazy straw before it hits your ear, so how can I determine what you hear...pessimistic people always hear what they want to hear." I've always questioned how when you say something and it becomes completely misconstrued once it goes in and hits the grey matter, but I think this line explains it. I can't count the amount of times in relationships/marriage/etc. where I've said something that I thought was just conversation, or even a compliment, and I get the look from the other person like I'm Cerberus breathing fire and spitting at them. Instantly I've gone into defensive mode and am trying desperately to back peddle and figure out what the hell I've said, when the truth of the matter (and all false modesty aside), I haven't said a damn thing. The other party has misconstrued and is about to bitchslap me. Smartest thing here is to back away with your hands in the air and run for the border. Now, we all do this occasionally, and once in a while it's acceptable, but when it's a daily occurrence it's time to get out the walking shoes and book it like your heels are on fire. Just some more friendly advice from your friendly neighborhood Moloquin. I may not be right on many things, but I think I'm on with this one.

Oh yeah, the cart before the horse.

The car is dead, long live the car.

I have retired my very nice, but incredibly expensive to maintain sports car and went and bought a semi-affordable, cheap to maintain, slightly used sports car. I don't think it's a good thing that I've driven five different cars in a week and half, but means to an end I suppose. The newish car has a problem with something in the fuel system (don't worry, I'm not going to go into car geek mode here), so it's back at the dealership getting fixed. The reaction from people has been strange, and I think it lends itself to the point I was trying to make above. As I describe that my car is having issues, people are saying sorry to me. Huh? Does this strike anyone else as odd? I mean, I understand what people are saying, and I'm not spurning the gesture, but it's just a car. It can and will be fixed so I'm not going to get my panties in a bunch over it. I think it's because we are all afraid that we are going to find one of those demon spawned people hiding when bad shit happens. Having a car needing repairs sucks, but in the grand scheme of things it's not a horrible thing. Falling onto a piece of bamboo and getting that lodged in your urethra, now that is horrible, but a broken car?

I think I need to get myself in a relationship...or maybe just a big bag of crack.

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Oh, and it's really late on a work night, so if this entry doesn't make any sense (or less sense than normal), now you know why. G'night peeps.

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