Blind Faith, Everyone Follow the Leader.

Seeing that it is Sunday night and I'm doing laundry again, let's rap about something controversial. It seems Sunday's draw out the controversy in me, or maybe its laundry. I think I'll chat about something that I don't talk about much on the blog. Let's talk about theology. In specific, I'm going to talk about Christianity and the life of Jesus Christ. I'm going to keep this as impartial as possible. If there is one thing I absolutely hate it's people who try to force their beliefs down your throat. I always felt that anybody can believe in anything they want. For the most part, most religions are based on the same morals and ideals anyways. Damn...Here comes the car bomb. One thing I'm not going to do (or at least try) is to not attack any religion. I could write for pages on the "foibles" of various religions, but I'm not going to go down that path...yet.

I've always found theology fascinating, and in particular, the premise of Jesus particularly interesting. I like the story, and I think there is a great point in there, but it's the application that I'm going to chat about. Here's a little background for those of you who either aren't into Christianity, or big on theology. The life of Jesus is outlined for the most part in the Gospels. There are four Gospels in the most widely accepted version of the Bible. These have always been accepted as the life story of Jesus. Here's the neat part. According to most scientific accounts, there are around twenty Gospels about his life. Hmmm. Interesting. So, there are twenty stories about the life and death of Christ, and only four are taught. Does this seem a little strange to anyone other than me? You'd think that in something as important as belief and faith you should be able to decide for yourself what is important, and not what some guy in ancient times decided should be included.

Now, here's a little bit of history to add into the mix. The four Gospels in the bible are considered to be the earliest telling, but by most accounts it has been accepted that the earliest one (Gospel of Mark BTW) was recorded around 66 years after the crucifixion. Let's put this in perspective. 66 years of telling a story over and over. I remember playing the telephone game and after 10 minutes the sentence was completely screwed up.

There are a few of Gospels which have been recently discovered in the Middle East. These were ordered to be destroyed by the powers that were around 200 AD. Luckily they were stashed away by some of the translators to be found later. I highly recommend giving them a read. One is the Gospel of Judas which shows an interesting take on Judas role, not as a betrayer, but that he was acting under an order given from Jesus. A couple of other highlights are the idea that God is inside all of us, and it needs to be freed in order for you to go to the next life, and it is the only Gospel which describes Christ laughing. The other two that are worth reading are The Gospel of Thomas , which is interesting as it is portrayed as sayings that Christ said to his apostles, and the Gospel of Mary Magdalene , which is interesting in itself as it was written by a women, and thus not allowed into the bible as it was a male-concentric sect when the books to the bible were chosen. Since it is now widely acclaimed that Mary Magdalene was only portrayed as a prostitute by the church, and not actually one, it creates some nasty implications. If you really get into this kind of stuff, I'd recommend attacking the Nag Hammadi Library , but be warned, this is not easy reading material. You have to really enjoy theology in order to get into this stuff.

Enough of the history lesson. Here's the point of all this dry theology shit. People are taught to believe and base their faith on the bible, but it is entirely possible (if not probable) that they aren't hearing the whole story. Doesn't it seem logical that we should be able to hear all of the bits and draw our own conclusion. Without getting into what I do or do not believe, it would really suck to dedicate your life to a faith that is wrong because someone decided that a couple of the books of the bible should be left out because they aren't popular, or because they were written by a women. Worse yet, if hell exists, wouldn't it suck to be thrown there because everyone missed the important bit?

This all comes back to what I've said many, many times. How can anyone make a decision about something if they don't have all the facts? How can people put there faith in something without doing there own research? I whole heartedly believe in freedom of religion, and I think it's wonderful that we all live on a planet where there is so much diversity in faith, but when you blindly accept what you are being told, you are a sheep. If you are going to make such an important decision, make it wisely. Always check the depth of the water before you dive in.

Jesus said, "If a blind person leads a blind person, both of them will fall into a hole."
Verse 34
The Gospel of Thomas

There is Only One Conclusion to Every Story, We All Fall Down.

A wise man once told me that in order to truly judge a person, don't judge them when they are in the best of times, instead judge them by how they act at the worst of times. The reasoning behind this is fairly simple. When you are in a very good place mentally and physically, it is very easy to be a good person. When you are at your worst place, it takes that much more to still be a good person. We all know people who are miserable, and in turn, make the world around them miserable for everyone else. I don't know if this is caused by self-pity, or perhaps there is some primordial implant telling us that misery does love company, but it is very important to recognize when you are turning into that miserable sod, and do everything in your power to reverse the trend. We have all been guilty of this, and I'm not saying that during the shittiest moments in your life you can't be down or depressed, but as a whole we have to recognize when we are going down that path and consciously make changes to prevent ourselves from being sucked down into the bog.

The thing that really sucks about this premise is some people keep themselves in a hole for so long they begin to accept that misery is their natural state, and if they aren't in a state like this at the moment, it just means that something worse is coming around the corner. People in this state seem to relish the fact that they are miserable, and can only gain comfort by a) thinking that there must be someone in life who is more miserable than them, b) rebelling and hating everyone around them in order to detach themselves from any outside influence that could change there state of misery or c) making everyone around them miserable so they don't feel alone. It's like the symbol of the snake eating it's own tail. It's an emotional perpetual motion machine. The longer it goes on, the harder it is to break the cycle. I truly and honestly believe that anyone can change this state if they believe they want to. Often times it's a very difficult uphill battle, but can be accomplished with enough power of will. The whole trick is recognizing that you want to change and doing it. It's an addiction. In order to beat it, you have to recognize it.

The one thing I will add to this is my hatred of the medical machine. Where the hell did that come from? Well, I'll tell you. The medical machine prescribes millions of dollars worth of medication every year for people to deal with depression. I'm not saying that all the cases are not necessary, but I'd be willing to say that eighty percent of those prescriptions are not needed. Most of the time, people just need to be heard and taught how to change their life for the better, but where are the profit margins in that for the big drug corporations? Instead, let's prescribe barely tested drugs to turn the populace into zombies so they don't object and keep coming back for more drugs that are completely and utterly fucking up their soft organs, and who knows what they are doing to the chemicals in their brains.

Everyone is looking for a quick fix, and it will only cost you a hundred dollars a month for the meds (which are paid for by the government)...and your kidneys.

People need to wake the fuck up and realize that the only way you can change is to consciously do it yourself, and want to make that change. It's not going to happen overnight, or maybe it could. The problem is people don't try.

There are a couple of points that I'm passionate about, and I managed to get myself started on one. The problem is when you see this happen to some one who is close to you, and no matter what you do, you can't do anything about it. Watching someone slowly kill themselves, emotionally as well as physically, for no real reason is one of the hardest things anyone will ever have to deal with. It's one of those experiences that I hope never to go through again.

Now, you may be asking yourself, where the fuck is he going with all this? The answer is, he doesn't know. Just one of those ideas that popped in my head I suppose. Ok, the truth of the matter is, I've often poke fun at my own (fictitious) string of bad luck. Not to say that this shit doesn't happen, but I wanted to state that I don't believe that I am destined for (non-existent) bad luck in my life. The reason that I mostly write about these kinds of things is because they are fun tales to tell. To paraphrase Douglas Adams (ha, It's been a while, but I knew I'd quote him again), no one wants to read a story about some ones average day. Lest we forget about the great orators Thomas Chong and Cheech Marin. "On the first day of my summer vacation I went down town to look for a job, and hung out in front of the drug store..." etc etc etc. It’s perfect for comedic value, but not for exciting writing. No one wants to read a forty-two page essay about me waking up, having a shower, brushing my teeth, getting dressed and driving to work.

Well, that was quite a Sunday entry. I have to get on my soapbox occasionally or I'll explode in outrage all over the place. It usually ends up coming out when I'm pub crawling and ends with yet another bar I'm not allowed in. I'm running out of pubs around my house...

"A misery is not to be measured from the nature of the evil, but from the temper of the sufferer."
Joseph Addison

Proud or Strong, it's All about Choice

One of the more interesting things about human nature would have to be the nature of choice. We are all given the right to choose, even though we usually don't exercise that right when we should. It's one of those things that create a huge conflict of interest, especially when emotion or passion gets in the way. Two of the main points are in the title of this entry. I consider both pride and strength to be a pair of the better qualities of human nature, but both of them can also be a large detriment where certain things are concerned. Let’s talk about the nature of these two and how they can conflict so strongly, even though they are both so important to our nature.

There is a fine line where either strength or pride must back down in order for our needs to be met. Most of us use strength and pride to define what we are and how we function. The tricky part is to not let either of them get in the way of human development. Here's a quick example. If people are in a bad situation, sometimes we won't ask, or accept help when it is offered. Sometimes we will say everything is fine, even when we know that it isn't. This is the dual nature of being human. Most people know they should accept help when it is offered, but will turn it down because they either feel that they need to be strong, or that they are too proud to accept. We're a confusing bunch aren't we? Yours truly is especially guilty of this. To fit in with what I've been writing about I guess I could say that its pride, but I think in all honesty I should admit that it's probably stubbornness that will stop me from admitting when something is wrong. I guess this is what happens when one of the afore mentioned attributes goes too far. This is another one of those tricky things to self diagnose. Stubbornness can be very useful in certain situations, but it more often screws up whatever it is you are working for. Another of the problems with this (at least for me) is logic. People who base their life around logic believe that there is a formula and solution for everything, and if we collect enough data, we can figure it out. The failing of this is when the data you get comes from something which doesn't follow logic. I think another example is in order. Emotion is what dictates most of our choices in life. When emotions run awry, the logical person will try to figure out the formula behind why things are going crazy. On the whole, emotion does not follow logic; therefore the formula does not exist. That's not to say that we won't fixate and try to figure one out, even though we know we can't. The worst part of all this is seeing the fault, but not doing anything about it. I think I'm going to steal a quote from Obi here. Insanity is repeating things and expecting a different outcome. Blech, that's enough to think about for now.

On a completely separate subject, sort of, one of the most maddening things in life is when you know someone for many years, and even though they know you very well, they expect the worst behavior from you when something bad happens, even if it is against your nature. When it is in your nature to be one way, it is not suddenly going to change. At least it won't if you are true to your beliefs and morals.

Damn, I'm hopping all over the place tonight. I think I better call this one quits before I end up talking about the reproductive systems of goats, or the political strife in lower Asia. My tracking must be off. It must have been all the Caffrey's last night.

"Everyone should carefully observe which way his heart draws him, and then choose that way with all his strength."
Hasidic Saying

A Bit More Choke and You Would Have Started...

Without glasses I have a whole new lease on many of the hobbies I've had in the past. One of which is Billiards. I forgot how much easier is to play the game when you aren't trying to aim your shot by looking through your glasses while standing up, then trying to make the shot from memory as soon as you lean down to take it. The problem with playing Boston (and any other pool game for that matter) with glasses is you always end up looking above your glasses as soon as you are crouched down over your cue. Turns out that when you can see the pocket at the other end of the table, you can pot it more often. Who'd of thunk it. I also learned not to play pool against my father. Intentionally or not, he can hook me every time and put the cue ball exactly where I don't want it to be, which goes to prove you don't need to make a shot, just screw the next person on theirs. It turns into a war of attrition, but works, so who am I to judge. I can take some pleasure in the fact that I did win two out of three games. I don't suck as much as I thought I would after not playing for so long. Now that I've said that, I'll be sure to burn for the next ten games I play. If you see some guy in the pool hall grinning like an idiot because he can see the far end of the table, come on over an challenge me to a game. I won't give you much of a run for your money, but I'll be happy as I lose.

The other hobby of mine that is completely new again is photography. I've gotten into the habit of always carrying my camera with me in the car, and it paid off this weekend. I'd like to introduce you to my new friend. His name is Lance. I don't know why. He just seemed to like the name, well, as much as a large snapping turtle likes a human name. It decided to stop traffic on one of the back roads on the way to the Easter festivities. In my true nature, rather than try to get it off the road, or drive carefully around it, I threw my car into park and went for my camera in my back seat. Now, there is a very valid reason that these things are called snapping turtles. Take a look at the beak on that thing. Doesn't it look happy.

To put it in scale, the shell on this one was probably up around 24 to 28 inches or so. Not the biggest I've seen, but not too small either.

If you know a photographer, you will be aware of the certain mannerism I'm about to describe. When the perfect shot comes up, a photographer will stop whatever they are doing in order to get the shot. This can mean dropping the phone they are conversing on, stopping whatever they are doing and frantically searching for the right lens, or forgetting that the thing they are running in to take the picture of has the same physiology and mentality as a dinosaur. To add insult to injury, it has sharp claws and a big friggin beak that can take a couple of fingers off in one clean snap. It's also in a perpetual bad mood. And off I go, out of my perfectly safe car to chase this thing down doing my best Steve Irwin impersonation. Admittedly, a turtle can't move all that fast, but when you have a couple of pounds of camera around your neck and the target is boogieing away, everything is moving fast. I managed to get in front of the thing with one of my big zoom lenses and tried to block it from getting away into the swamp behind me. This is another one of those things that photographers do. Don't worry about any danger that you may put yourself in, as long as you can prolong time to get a couple of extra shots. The good thing was, I managed to get a bunch of shots off and I still have my camera and all my fingers, so it was all worth it. Lance wandered off to the swamp only slightly more pissed off than normal, and I got a bunch of shit to put on my Blog. Yay for me.

I hate it when people don't do research before writing things. Laziness is the bane of rational thought. Bitterman hasn't made an appearance in a while, so I figure I'd let him out of the attic for a couple of sentences.

"I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters."
Solomon Short

Pasteurized or Au Naturale?

I just finished watching Domino on TV, and as par usual, I hopped onto IMDB to check out all the Trivia and stuff about it. This is a normal practice for me after I see a film I enjoy. I actually enjoyed it quite a bit, even though I had been warned away from it as if it were a plague bearer (I think I actually watched it for Keira Knightley, but that's neither here nor there). I glanced down and noticed the horrible rating it has been getting from many of the IMDB patrons. I can see why some people wouldn't like it. It is an unconventional film, and wandered about quite a bit, but I wasn't expecting such an abysmal rating. After seeing the horrible rating, and against my better judgment, I decided to check out what people were saying on the forum. As with all things, I like to understand the method behind the madness. Before I start spilling over into the next bit, I should mention that I think everyone's opinion is valid, but if you are going to have an opinion about something, please explain why. If you watched or did something that you didn't like, even if you are not sure why, just write "I didn't like it" and leave it at that. Don't open your mouth and start spewing shit which has no bearing, and no point. I think a simplified example is in order. If somebody writes, "I liked this film", and the reply is "This movie sucked, and you are stupid because you liked it", it is a completely useless post. What exactly did the reply add to the discussion? Nothing. The only thing it did was waste a few seconds of my life. Flame wars on the Internet are pointless. Nothing is learned, and with no knowledge to be gained, there is no point. Maybe people who start flame wars just can't express themselves in real life, so they try to exert themselves behind the mask of the anonymity of the Internet. Aha, and there's the rub. The main motivation is fear. Fear of expressing and being yourself in real life, so you create an alternate reality to try and be the person you want to be on the Internet, and yes, I am aware of the irony and the hypocrisy of using the same powers of anonymity on my blog thanks. Now no one has to point it out.

Back onto the train that I started this trip on.

I think there are two main type of movie viewers in the world. Those who like a movie to be spoon fed to them and predictable, and those who tread off the beaten path and enjoy films that are generally disregarded and scorned by the majority of the public. I'm not saying that either group is right, or completely exclusive, but I think it's safe to say we all fall stronger into one of these groups or the other. Occasionally I do enjoy some silly, pointless piece of Hollywood clap-trap, but for the most part I dig deeper into films. One of the things which impacts me the most in a film is if it has a mood or feeling associated with it. That is probably why I dislike many of the films that are blockbusters. They are enjoyable for the 90 minutes that you spend with them, but leave no aftertaste. I like a film that leaves me feeling something, or is thought provoking. Hmm, allusion time? I think not. Anyways, I know Domino is probably not a good example in this case, as it is not exactly the most thought provoking film in the world, but it is unique. Maybe weird for the sake of being weird is the phrase I'm looking for. I dunno. I'm just writing what the little voices are telling me to.

Now, the bit I like. If you take more from column A than from column B, there is no reason that you have to dislike people who enjoy the reciprocate. Perfect example of this is Obi and Company VS. Myself. We are great friends, and generally agree on most things, but our ratio with movies that we all enjoy is around 20%-30%. That doesn't mean that the movies they like suck, or the movies that I like suck, it just means we have different tastes in entertainment. Just because I listen to music which is reminiscent of white noise, does not mean that if you don't like it, you're an idiot. It just means we have different opinions, and they are both valid. No harm, no foul. Just don't you dare to try playing Justin Timberlake or Nickelback in my car. That is ground for an instant boot to the head and you rolling down the highway beside my car. We all have our limits of tolerance.

In the perfect world, entertainment would be judged by fans, and not by corporations telling us what to like and not to like. I know it has very little to do with the topic of tonights sermon, but I felt like writing it anyways.

"Laws alone can not secure freedom of expression; in order that every man present his views without penalty there must be spirit of tolerance in the entire population."
Albert Einstein

The Eye's Have It.

First off, I know I haven't updated in a while, and the worst part is it isn't even for any real noble or good reason. I could play the "recovering from surgery card", but even that wouldn't play out for this long. The real reason is two-fold, one directly stemming from the other. I recently went out and bought Oblivion for the Xbox 360, and damn, that sucker can eat up time when you aren't looking. It's reminiscent of the first time I discovered Doom for my 486. I played that one so much I was seeing a floating gun in front of me in real life. Well, oblivion pretty much had the same effect. Normally I get hooked on a new game for about 2 or 3 days, then I'm bored and move on to whatever brainstorm I happen to have. This one, like doom, became all consuming. The official reason I haven't been updating is due to a damn video game. The second reason is, when you have a week off of work to heal, and you can't go anywhere because of afore mentioned healing, you find something to do to keep you occupied, and it became oblivion for this case. So, to sum up and not continue to blather on about something which isn't interesting for most of the world, I've been playing video games and not much else, thus a non-active life makes for nothing interesting to write about. Gah, that took about 10 sentences too many.

The other question I'm sure is going to come up is about the eye surgery. I regret to say that this entry is not going to be about that. There will be an upcoming entry though. Reason being is I'm waiting for the film to come out. Seriously. Obi and I shot a documentary based around the surgery, and I'm waiting for the raw version so I can post some of the highlights of the procedure. Don't worry, I'll put lots of warnings and disclaimers so people don't accidentally stumble upon a picture of my eye peeled open like a grape. Worst case basis, I can always sell the footage to a B-rate horror movie studio. The only things I will say is it was a complete success and I can see without glasses for the first time since Grade 6. The hemorrhages in my eyes are also starting to go away, and although I like scaring little kids, it also scares adults away when I take off the sunglasses.

After being that long winded of an intro, I suppose I should get down to the nitty gritty and actually write something that resembles a blog update. Let's talk about choice and personality re-programming. That sounds like fun.

Obi and I were chatting the other night about personality profiling, and if you can change your personality once you know what you are. For example, if you take a personality test and you discover your personality reflects that you are "thinking" type rather than a "feeling" type, can you change that element of your personality so you can change your outcome in life? If all of this is completely alien to you, you can take a Myers-Briggs test for free to get some background on what I'm talking about. Just google for it or go "here". In true exhibitionist fashion (which is also the complete opposite of my profile) I am an INTP "link" or "link". I've taken the Myers-Briggs test many times over the years, and ever since grade eight it has always returned the same results. It also describes my personality perfectly.

Ok, kind of fell of the tracks there. Back onto the topic at hand. Both of us came to the same conclusion that you can change your personality type if you really want to, but it would involve a lot of hard work, and constant mental conditioning until you accepted the new reforms of your personality. Luckily for me, I'm very comfortable within my personality. That's not to say that I haven't risen to the occasion and changed bits when I need to. The one facet that I am constantly changing between is the "introvert" and the "extrovert". Growing up I was always introverted, and as much as I enjoy withdrawing from the world at times, I can also see the need to be part of it. Perfect example...It's hard to meet new people if you never leave your house.

Once you realize your personality type, it can be changed so you can become what you truly want to be, or, you can use it to determine if you are doing what you are supposed to be doing. I've known for a very long time that I am not doing what I was truly meant to do. I do enjoy my job for the most part, and the challenges it puts in front of me, but it is not my passion, and all of the careers that I could be passionate about do fall into my personality type. Of course, I could just get bored of a new career and look for something new as time goes on. I just have to find a company that will pay me to play video games and watch pr0n.

Enough for tonight. Conan the Barbarian is on, and I haven't seen this film since I was a kid. Time to see if it's just as corny as I remember. Cya.

Oh, and congrats are in order for Alex and Laurie.

"The meek shall inherit the earth? Well... I don't think so. If by meek you mean friendly and introverted, okay maybe, but if by meek you mean unwilling to take a chance, then never. If I was a betting man and I had to wager on who I thought would inherit the earth, my money would be on the curious."
Jim Coudal